Asking for ~PRAYER~
I recently had another flareup. I spent 3 days in the hospital- I suffered silently, like the strong soldier, I am. The lone wolf. 😊☺️ However, I woke up just now, head in a fog, dizzy, room spinning, hungry, yet no appetite, I cannot taste seasonings, vision is impaired, my voice is gone, I'm walking slow and sound bothers me. I want to read my devotional and my Bible, but my eyes are not stable enough. I cannot imagine this will be my life – for the rest of my life. Weeks in recovery – just to be able to take a shower without an hour break in between dressing myself and brushing my teeth. Don't get me wrong, these are HUGE accomplishments I celebrate with every fiber of my being, but I get a lil sad thinking that each time I go through a flareup I must hit the reset button and begin again. This is my new normal and I'm not exactly used to it yet. Even though I think I've gotten there, something like waking up to my reality reminds me I'm not there yet. I still have a ways to go. It's only been two years in. Oh my goodness.
My body shakes all over, uncontrollably. I try to maintain. To act "normal" to not let in that something is different – something's changed. It's hard to convince myself that things are different now. I think about people I've met along my journey who have shared with me their stories, 15, 21, 26, 29, 32 yrs in, oh my goodness, will this really be my song, too? I'm only two yrs in and have only suffered a total 5 relapses since being diagnosed in 2015. It seems like forever.
I have no complaints. I'm just not sure of what tomorrow will be. Plans to be anything other than a person who struggles with MS is really all I plan my days around.
Well, thank you for listening and for praying. I hope that if anything you gain strength from what I'm enduring. Together we become stronger.
What we have to look forward to is far more better than what we are seeking to overcome on this end, believe…
~Smile, though you’re heart is breaking~
Now on the road to recovery.
Ended up back at the ER, Tuesday evening. Waited over 12 hours for a bed/room. -Spent 3 days in the hospital. Didn’t tell hardly anyone. Just who needed to know.
Had a wonderful view of the outside. God answered my prayers.
I just rolled with it all.
Discharged from hospital, last night (7/21/17).
Pained my heart so to see my children cry for me when I informed them I had to go back to the hospital.
I hate that they don’t have a normal teen life.
I went to ER, last Monday (7/10/17), and the attending doctor (who is not an MS specialist, confined me to outpatient prednisone tablet treatment, which I found later was the wrong call to make on his part. Made things worse. He should’ve admitted me, immediately and got the ball rolling that night – do it right the first time!
I needed the Solution-Medrol 3-5 treatment. Saw my neurologist on that following Tuesday afternoon and he sent me back to the ER with particular instructions to hand to the doctors – which got the ball rolling. 2 CT-scans (1 w/contrast) and 4 MRI’s later – no new lesions showed up.
They monitored my heart and everything. I cannot say what went wrong other than MS has a mind of its own. Last night, this female doctor just woke me up out of my sleep and kicked me out. I felt so bad. I was hurt, but glad my family was here to receive me. I’m moving extremely slow. My voice is fatigue. I’m just out of it.
My eldest daughter and I are together, clipping coupons. Well, we just have to make the best out of everything. Good and bad. I’m exhausted. Glad she is here to help me through this.
MS is just what it is. Taking it slow. One day at a time. More meds. No energy. No appetite. Nothing tastes right. I’m just here. Getting by. Making the most out of it. STILL SMILING.
We must continue to thank God…
He's been more than gracious, more than faithful. He's the only One who has never abandoned us in our time of need. Today, I lay here – thankful… Grateful for modern medicine, health insurance to cover my expenses, and for all those in the medical field who dedicate their lives, their time, their knowledge, skills, years of schooling and their care to help those of us who are not feeling well – on any given day. They play a big part in our recovery. We don't always have to be instantaneously feeling better- just knowing they are dependable and have compassion for us makes a world of difference. I really have great respect for those who work in healthcare industry – and it's NOT just a job. It's their passion to help make our journey toward recovery as pleasant as possible. This is why I always show my gratitude. They give so much of themselves. God bless them all. It lightens the load some. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Count your blessings, not your problems. Find your balance in it all. 🙂
Keep a healthy perspective about everything (good, bad, or ugly). Think we'll. Live well. Be well. #eveninthis #thistooshallpass