Mercy! I lived to tell it!!
The ugly truth we so enjoy hiding. God is never fooled. He will not be mocked nor denied.
~HARDEN NOT YOUR HEART~
GOD CANNOT BE MOCKED.
Make a daily commitment to the Lord and to yourself to fight against your flesh.
True worshippers have a very big battle, not just against the craziness of this world, but we battle against what our “natural” wants to do. We desire with everything in us to give the Spirit full control over us, but the flesh just (always) wants what it wants and to do what it wants to do.
Don’t be fooled. This struggle is REAL, everyday.
Where much is given, much is required. The walk of a disciple is not easy at all.
Who knew that a week after studying Romans 5-8, I’d be confronted by the evil in my flesh? Not wanting to give God glory in the midst of my troubles, fighting against spending time with Him and WANTING TO STAY MAD AT EVERYTHING AND REMAIN IN MY FUNK! This was me, throughout the majority of my day, yesterday.
Truth is truth. No hiding it.
I was pissed off and God was not getting anything from me until I was ready and felt like doing it. Mercy! Why God allowed me to live and tell it – I can only imagine He is raising me up to warn others…
NO MATTER WHAT –
HE DESERVES IT!!!!
God deserves to receive all of our praise – all the glory and the honor due Him, regardless of what we are going through. That is true praise and worship. Sacrifice of praise is what God desires (requires) and honors. Anyone can praise Him when everything is going in our favor. It’s when the chips are down and we’ve spiraled downward where the rubber meets the road.
Yesterday, my mother and I went as a pair to handle some very important business. We left as a team, but we walked through the forest as individuals. Mom was in steady worship mode, while I remained in anger mode. Stubborn as an ass. Pun intended.
As we walked out of our home and was approaching my car, I noticed something very strange about my trunk. I opened it to place my walker into it, but it wouldn’t shut closed. I could not understand what was going on. Now this??? I angrily lashed out to God in my mind. 😡
Mom and I tried our best to fix it, but it would not budge. I reluctantly took my walker and walked slowly back down the path toward my house. Pissed off!! Once inside, I determined, because God has allowed soooooooooooooo much turmoil to befall me and my family, I will not enjoy this day. No matter what the outcome. I will not give Him any praise until I see things going my way. For real. I made up my mind to be STUPID, I mean, stubborn in the face of God. He wasn’t going to get nada from me. I was determined. I guess you can say – I felt like “punishing” God for all the disasters which were taking place around us. STUPID!!!
I grabbed the tape and angrily walked back to my car – I taped the trunk down in anger (like Moses, I STRUCK THAT ROCK WITH ALL OF MY HATE, not good. Not good, at all. See Numbers 20:1-13, things did not end well for Aaron after he rebelled against God. Moses could not enter into the promise land – due to his anger and frustration toward the people of Israel. Know our rebelliousness against God CAN block our blessings. We choose…)
Then I got in on the driver’s side and my mom reached for my hand to pray in Jesus’ name for victory and resolve (a great outcome). She gave thanks and the war within me only grew stronger. Yep! That just pissed me off more! (See the story of Cain and Abel in Genesis 4)
But I began to weep, silently. Why? Did I lose my faith in God? No. Did I doubt Him? No. I began to cry, because in my (SPIRIT), in righteousness – I knew I was wrong to take such anger out on the Lord, on the day, on the fight we were in and on my family. I was sinning against my own temple and the One who dwelled in it. Do you get it? Most importantly, I was taking it out on me – which I knew deep down inside I was blocking God – all of God’s blessings sent to meet us in our day of battle – despite the battle. Mercy! Even knowing what choices I’d make, God STILL chose to send the refreshing rains. Mercy, Jesus. How foolish of me. 😔
Sad to say, this went on for many hours. When mom was worshipping over all the good which God was performing on our behalf – I complained. I CHOSE to remain in misery. I pray I’m getting through to someone. Yes, the praise and worship psalmist, minister CHOSE to obey my flesh over doing as the Spirit of the Lord was urging me and leading me to do in the sight of the Lord. How I lived to tell it? Mercy. The mercy of the Lord, is all I can say.
I chose to follow my flesh and in sin I hardened my heart against God and refused to give thanks for anything He was doing on our behalf, and yet HE CONTINUED… HE GAVE, AND GAVE, AND GAVE. Mercy, Jesus. I acted like a spoiled brat – feeling all super entitled. God deserved the glory!! Who am I?
Hebrews 3:15 (ESV)
As it is said, “Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts as in the rebellion.”
The more doors He opened for us, yesterday, the more rain He poured out on us – the dumb I got – the more I refused Him and hardened my heart. This is sin, y’all!! It’s pure sin.
Glory to God – He knew…
God knew my breaking point. He knew I would not stay there long. He knew the moment I (my spirit man which knows His voice and is attuned to follow His lead, by way of the Living Spirit of the Lord) heard His voice I’d respond in the right way. Right! And things went just as He planned it to go. Hallelujah!!! God knows what He’s doing. He allows us to only go so far in our temporary insanity. Praise the Lord!! 😜😂😁
He called to me, like the Good Shepherd, HE IS. 😁
I was watching “Frasier” on Hulu. Minding my own business. Locked away from everyone – wanting to just be by myself in my misery. Enjoying my pity party. (See Jonah 3-4, Jonah in anger and frustration grew extremely depressed, and God in His mercy, still showed Jonah, His servant His marvelous compassion).
All day God was calling me to worship, to spend time with Him, but I kept refusing His invitation. It felt more comfortable being in my zone – watching tv – not doing the work of the Spirit and fighting against my flesh. I was comfortable right where I was. “Why fight?” I thought to myself, while curled up on my bed. “Tomorrow will only be met with another battle. What’s the point?” Oh, yeah! I was deep in my misery. I had gone as far as to tell God what the next day would be like. Bold and dumb. Who am I, again? Did I create this world and place the moon and the sun and the stars in their rightful places and divide the day from the night? Nope! God did all of that. He’s the only One who knows and holds my times. He orders my steps and decides which outcomes are best for me and my spiritual growth in Him. He decides how He will be best be glorified in my life. And so even if I don’t praise Him – He will cause the rocks to cry out in honor of His greatness and His wonderfulness in my place. Mercy!!
I kept feeling the nudge of the Spirit’s hand and kept hearing my Shepherd’s voice to come to Him.
Then He pulled out His ACE card. 😂
God showed me the visual of Jesus and the 10 lepers whom He healed. Only one out of the 10 returned to Him to give thanks. (See Luke 17:11-19) Mercy, Lord! God shows us great, enduring compassion, when we do not deserve anything but His wrath. 😔
I heard the voice of my heavenly Father, as He showed me in a vision a conversation between He and my mother, asking her, “I sent two of you out together. I blessed you both. I answered both of your prayers long before you prayed to me. Where is the other?” MERCY!!!!!!!! 😥😓😪😭
I IMMEDIATELY muted my tv program, grabbed my pen and began to write in my journal about my day – I opened up about the bad attitude I chose to have – and before I knew it – I WAS IN TEARS ~I WAS REPENTING FOR IT ALL~ I ALLOWED HOLY SPIRIT TO UNDO WHAT I HAD DONE IN THE PRESENCE OF THE LORD – HE OFFERED ME A SECOND CHANCE AND I GAVE THANKS TO THE LORD. I GAVE THANKS FOR EVERYTHING HE DID – FROM THE TIME HE WOKE ME UP TIL I RETURNED HOME FROM BATTLE. AS SOON AS I CAME TO MYSELF (See Luke 15:17) – & MY EYES WERE OPENED TO ALL OF MY EVIL, I REPENTED & I GAVE THANKS FOR ALL OF WHAT GOD HAD DONE FOR US/ME.
Harden not your hearts. God has just been too, too, too good to us. He deserves our praise, our worship, all the glory and every one of our hallelujahs. He deserves it whether He answers or not, comes through for us or not or chooses to take long or a changes direction to go a different route. We don’t own rights to God. He owns the rights to us (believer or not), paid by the holy blood of His own Son, Jesus. We have been bought with a price. We belong to Him. He is due more, because He’s worthy of it all!!!
It’s better when we give it, free, to Him, everything He’s due, but in the event it takes a little more than what we can offer freely, God will accept and honor our sacrifice of praise, just the same. Just so long that it comes from a right place – a real place within our hearts. For Him and Him, alone. 😁
That is good news!!
God delights in and honors our battle – our struggle against this unrighteousness, our flesh. He looooooooves to see us fighting our way through what comes so naturally for us. DOING Wrong is our natural. But the supernatural power of the Holy Spirit TO DO WHAT IS RIGHT (RIGHTEOUS) is what gives us the strength to overcome our flesh and our natural inklings and desires. We will not side with the flesh if we are daily choosing to walk with the Spirit of God and to remain in the Lord and His ways. The Word clearly says, in Galatians 5:25 (ESV) “If we live by the Spirit, let us also keep in step with the Spirit.”
Even in our mad phase, the Spirit, whom we have daily consulted with (prior to our battle with rebellion against God) will kindly and gently (compassionately) lead us back to our right minds, a repentant heart and into all truth so we can again begin to honor the Lord, the Maker of all. (See John 16:13-15)
It is not God’s will for us to be lost to ourselves or to this world, but to save us from ourselves and spiritually remove us from all attachments of this sinful life, until the Day of the Lord, when all will be made new and we will be fully made new – our bodies glorified once and for all and sin completely done away with – FOREVER!!! (See Revelation 21:1, Philippians 3:21, 1 Corinthians 15:44, OUR BODIES WILL BE PERFECTED WHEN CHRIST JESUS RETURNS. No more fights against our flesh, against sin, nor our adversary).
So often we hear of “Breakthrough”. But breakthrough comes in many forms. Not just in the forms of material blessings we’ve been praying for. In this case, (and I wrote it in my journal) breakthrough comes in spiritual form to free us from sin’s grasp. It’s chokehold. God broke me out of my self-made prison so I could return to what is familiar to my new spiritual nature, return to my true ~First Love~ dismiss my old nature and habits, and once again relishes in His praises. I was freed for this purpose – to praise Him for who He is – just as I’ve been raised up and trained by the Spirit of the Lord to do. Practice prepares us for the real battles and for breakthrough. With righteous eyes we recognize the right and the wrong. In obedience to God we choose the right – His ways, His will over our own. It is not us, but the Spirit of Christ Jesus who lives in us who gives us this ability to overcome our flesh.
We are constantly paying attention to the demons in others and ignoring the demons and the unrighteousness in our own selves. We’re missing the venomous spiders and spiderwebs in our own hearts and our own lives trying to clean out other people’s cobwebs and spiders – we need to quit! Ijs. An old song comes to mind which simply said, “Sweep around your own front door before you come and sweep around mine.”
How is it we are being effective in our prayer life – praying for others while hiding away from our own truths? Pretending we’ve got it altogether. We can fool others, but God, we cannot fool. He knows… He sees… He will fix it when He’s had enough.
Return to your First Love and be loved the right way. Someone who truly loves you will fight for you and will not allow you to continue to destroy yourself or the greatness God has built up in your life.
Check yourself, always. Keep it real before God. He alone is due all honor, worship, praise, and glory – despite how we feel or the battles we face.
~GOD AND GOD ALONE~
Take this as good sound direction.
It is better to obey than to sacrifice. (1 Samuel 15:22)
Let God make your life into a sweet smelling fragrance He takes pleasure in. 😊
I will bless the Lord at all times, His praise will continually be in my mouth. (Psalm 34:1, see: vs 1-4)
Mean it – no matter what. Do the work. You’re always winning. #eveninthis
Dana Lewis, author